Which toilet roll is for you?

It’s arrived! Festival season. BBQ o’clock. Time to have a picnic. Camping. All of the summer activities! But, with all this excitement comes a shift. What was once a regular household item (toilet roll) is elevated to prestige. It becomes a rarity. Valuable goods. Contraband…

Best to stay prepared in these sorts of situations. Don’t get caught short in the Portaloo or worse, in the woods. There’s nothing worse than having to improvise with leaves. As with the roll on deodorant, here’s the low down on the qualities and features of the (exceedingly low priced) selection we offer.

This is a good camping roll. A 2ply (that means two layers, if you don’t know) tissue with an average of 180 sheets per role. Although it’s a bit bulky, made with micro air pockets, they’re super-absorbent so last even longer. Completely perfect for a weekend in the wilderness.

For all of you festival-goers who like a bit of luxury, these 4ply (that means extra thick) rolls are super-soft and gentle. Granted, you may be known as the posho with the quilted roll, but haters gon’ hate, right?

3. Andrex Gentle Clean Toilet Tissue 12pk, £4.29

This is a great accessory for a five day festival. 2ply sheets embossed with puppies (is that weird?) Use it as a pillow in the tent, stay hygienic and comfortable with absorbent softness. And, with 12 rolls, you could even start dealing it to your festival compadres.

This one’s a real luxury. Again, 9 rolls to keep you going in case you want to hit the festival a day early (i.e. thrifty keenos) and, it’s a soft 3ply. Quilted too so it feels extra velvety between the cheeks.

Speaking of thrift, this is a roll for anyone who waves their hands in the air and they just don’t care. £2.89 for 18 rolls?! Robbery. A soft 2ply that’s thick and quilted and with roughly 200 sheets per roll. Can anyone seriously argue with that?!

This one’s a good’un for a family weekend camping trip. Nine rolls of indulgently soft and quilted sheets. They’re also strong and thick 3ply in case of the inevitable, shoddy weather.

Although it’s not an essential, these little wipes are perfect for that extra bit of freshness. Not a camping fan? The flushable washlets are gentle on your skin with a soft, cotton fragrance and are great to make you feel human despite the wilderness.

This is a good choice for all you fancy-pants festival-goers. Enriched with vitamin E and aloe vera, it’s soft and gentle on any sensitive cheeks. Again, a 2ply nine pack is good for a longer festival and can double up too as a pillow or cushion.

This is good for anyone who’s especially environmentally friendly. Festival-goers who want to jive and save the trees, this is the one for you. Luxurious 3-ply quilting that feels velvety between the cheeks and a generous 16 rolls that could supply you and your party at Glasto. And, wait for it, for every tree they’ve planted, Velvet have promised to plant three in its place.

Feeling ready and set for the festival season? If you weren’t before, we sure hope that you are now. To check out the rest of our seasonal products (because, to be honest, toilet roll is probably more an all year round kind of thing) click here. We’ve got you summer sorted.

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